很久没有这么失望过了

你有没有试过，想了很久，徘徊了很久之后，终于决定拨一通电话？
电话响了。。。
然后你问了一句：“你睡熟了吗？”
对方的答复是：“你是谁？”

you know who cares when they scold you for doing something you know you shouldn't.
you know who cares when they telly you not to do things you know you should't.
and i know who cares, and who don't.

thank you, for every single one of you who told me not to run.
thank you, for every single one of you who told me to work had.
thank you, for every single one of you who wished me good luck.

all, of whom does not include you.

Labels: emo

my leg's not recovered, apparently.
hurts a little.
here and there.

how do you know if someone cares abt u?
it's so abstract right?

i need a run.. a good long run...
maybe tomorrow.

Have I mentioned before that Angel really remind me of myself?
She does.. more than anyone ever imagine..
Maybe that is why I can understand her.. Maybe that is why I like her..
Because she remind me of myself..

I can understand that she don't mean what she says.
How some people may not be able to tolerate the way she talks, her speech patterns actually strikes a cord in me.
Beneath all her toughness, she really just trying to protect herself.
It's a defense mechanism. Something she has learnt. Something which works.
Because thinking affects speech, and thus affects behavior.
Talking tough makes one feel tough..


So, I can understand.

Labels: randoms

My leg's been hurting for the past 1 week.
Brush it off as not being serious, I didn't see a doctor last week.
Then I got busier, and didn't have time to pay the doctor a visit.
But it got worse, and I had difficulty walking for the past few days..

So.. I went to the doctor this morning..
And it was OUCH la! super painful!!!!
When he rubbed my ankle, it was madness lor..
Told my dad "Just 'cause I didn't scream in pain, doesn't mean it's not painful"

So now my leg's in a bandage..
Can only take it off on monday.. =(
Asked the physician what's the problem, he said I might have injured my leg..

So now I'm home, working on my assignments and resting my leg...

Am in the KTV mood after watching 百万大歌星
after wednesday, after wednesday...

Labels: health

I was so stressed when I woke up this morning.
The journey to work did not work for me either.
Coming into the office and saying 'good morning' with a smiley face did not make me happier.
Thank god for Ethan. He has to be the only one who can bring a smile to my face right now.

Monday.
Wednesday.

I can't wait for Thursday, and yet I dread it.

You know how the Chinese always say
屋漏偏逢连夜雨
I totally understand how it feels.

It really feels very comforting when people come up to you and show you concern. Simply gestures, telling you to 'work hard' and 'jiayou'.
Telling you that they're always there for you to turn to.
It's really really heart warming, and I appreaciate it.
Really. Thanks, loo..

That's what I need right now.

3 essays, 3 reflection assignments, 1 test.

Wish me luck.

Labels: emo, randoms, thoughts

don't know whether is it the deadlines coming up, or the happenings at work..
feeling so tired recently..
not physically. emotionally. it's like there's a million and one things to do, but i cannot finish it, not motivated to finish it.. but in the end i still have to deal with it.
alone.

jon was telling me to get myself a choc cake and pamper myself after working so hard..
no point pampering myself lar..
pamper 了还不是一样..
save the money.

no one for me to complain to.. argh..
so tired.. i want to throw all my readings and papers and text books out of the window.
i want to go for a walk, do some shopping, nua with my girls, laugh.
it's so easy and yet so difficult to laugh.

getting my new specs tomorrow. can't wait.
and then i might go crazy and snip off my hair.
maybe.

is there anyone who will stop telling me what to do, what i should do, how i should feel; and listen to what i want to say?
i cannot counsel myself. damn..
now i know how i should never never give advise.
it's irritating; especially when you don't know anything.

i miss ethan.. come back soon, i miss you..

Labels: randoms

I have a tendency to eat whenever I'm upset/stressed/unhappy.
And not just anyfood. Specifically comfort food, i.e. chocolates, ice-cream (chocolate ice-cream), cakes (e.g. cheesecake, my Coco Exotic)... I guess I'm a very chocolate person; and when it comes to chocolate, the purer the better. Super dark ones are yummmmm..

haha.. So here I am, having a chocolate craving, and reading about blog posts about cakes and chocolates. So super tempted lar.. So many cakes I want to try..but no time, no company, no money.. hahaha..

Maybe I should come up with a list of the places I want to eat in. But then that would mean extra hours running, burning off the extra calories. And extra money spent, hence lightening my the weight of my wallet. Sighs...

I have craving for the chocolate eclair I had at 4 Leaves yesterday. Babe was so nice..she bought 2 eclairs because there was a promo, and she gave one to me!!! So sweet la~~ she knows I like the eclair there.
Was recently converted after finding a good eclair at 4 Leaves.. just 2nd to Beard Papa. Economical and nice enough to satisfy my chocolate craving.

I need another chocolate serving man.... got craving liao la... *sniffs sniffs*

Labels: food

During SHG on Saturday, I was chitchatting with my student again. This talkative girl who doesn't do her work until the last minute. She reminds me of myself sometimes..maybe that's why I really like her.

Anyway, she was complaining to me again about her not being able to see, and that her mom does not want to change her specs for her. I realised her degree is really deep and she cannot see at all. She's probably around 300 degrees and she doesn't wear specs - her old specs are way past her current degree.

I talked to Chris to see what we can do. He made a call and informed her parents that we realised she cannot see in class. Later on during the day, she msg-ed me and sounded like she blamed me because I told her dad about it. I was worried, because I did not let her know before I called. On hindsight, I should have. She should be treated like an adult, and I definitely do not like to have people calling my parents behind my back! So I apologized to her about it...and guess what! She seemed to be happy about the possibility that her dad might bring her to make new spectacles!

Later in the day, she told me she went to have her eyesight tested and ordered a new pair of specs at the same time. She told me about how much does it cost, and what's the color etc.. Then she said something which made me feel appreciated.

She said, "You're nicer than my school teacher. She didn't care when I told her I cannot see."

So happy lar!!!!!!! =)
(But her being her,she didn't say it so nicely..haa.. there was some not-so-nice yet-not-vulgarities words inside.)


Small incidents like this really made my day.

---

Went shopping in Chinatown with mom & dad yesterday. I haven't went out with them for quite some time, since we're always at home with the nephews. So, we decided to make a trip down Chinatown yesterday.

Was shopping around because mom was looking for a jacket for her upcoming trip. In the end she bought so many other irrrelevant stuff, like clothes, bah kwa etc..

Oh oh oh!! And I found this place in Chinatown which sells REALLY CHEAP toiletries and beauty products. They even have Laneige!! I felt like 省钱王 lor.. The shop is called Swanston, located on the 2nd floor of the just-renovated building behind OG.

So I was with my parents, and it felt so nice to be out with them. Walking around; laughing and making jokes with one another; listening to my dad talk about the past; waiting for my mom to try new clothes and giving her comments. There wasn't good food, nothing spectacular - but it was a day well-spent.

I feel so happy to be a daughter to my parents =)

---

Footnote: I'm always irritated with shopowners to talk to my mom about clothes-making like they're some expert; and shopowners who talk to my dad about doors/furniture like they're experts too.

And I don't like male shopowners who wants to persuade my mom to buy something, acts zealously overenthusiastically and try to persuade me too. -.- Especially so when they tap me on the shoulder or something along that line. I mean like, KEEP YOUR HANDS TO YOURSELF LAR!

Labels: family, thoughts