ok i just realised today that i've grossly neglected my blog.. haven't updated in ages..
and i'm not feeling very ok.. think i'm down with flu.. hopefully it goes away when i wake up tomorrow.. violet tells me to take off tmr.. hmm c how la..
i'm just glad that i have colleagues who care.. it feels very loved..
been doing alot of reading recently. am pleasantly surprised with really good books found in the hta library..
its those kind of books where you read and reflect back on it. i'd like to think i grew up a little..
first thing i learned was.. that life is so much more than we see it now.
how many of us actually recognise the fact that we will all die one day. i mean, seriously come to face it with no fear. i think about death, but i don't think it will happen to me in the recent future. and that means i'm not coming to terms with it. honestly, there's nothing difficult about it. look in the mirror, and tell myself 'i will die one day'. now that's not that difficult right? but i don't do it. and i'm sure neither do you.
but do you realise that, unless you come to terms with it, you wouldn't have really lived?
when you learn how to die, you learn how to live
and it's so true. if you recognise the fact that you will die one day, you will truly start living.. because of the realisation, you learn to live each day with all you have. you will try your best to not let that day go to waste. you will not procrastinate. you will do what you think is meaningful. you will not live with regrets..
and i also learned that, i have to learn how to detach from my feelings..
it's not that i do not feel, but i learn to how to let go of those feelings.. like, if i feel regretful, i recognise that i'm feeling regretful, and i let go of those feelings.. we shouldn't cling onto the feelings.. when we do, we tend to not notice the things that would mean so much more..
wow i have so much things to say.. erm.. if you don't have time, don't read ok? ;)
something else is.. despite all we're feeling, we should let it go after it passed..
you can be mad at someone, sad with someone.. but after you calmed down, talk it over. solve the problem, and not let the issue pass. give both parties closure. the important thing is not the anger you felt, but rather how the other party felt. if the feeling had passed, then don't harp on it anymore.. listen, to what the other party has to say. sometimes, you have to see both sides of the coin to realise that you might not be so right afterall..
the person who said sorry might not be the one who is wrong.. saying sorry is a way of saying 'i don't want to quarrel anymore. let's make up.' it takes alot of courage to say sorry, so don't put down the person who apologizes. instead, treasure him/her for the courage and love for you..
someone asked me today if i was upset with something that happened over the weekend. i said i'm ok. frankly, i felt a little disappointed when i found out about it, but i got over it. i recognised that i'm feeling this way because it matters to me. but i also understand that there were underlying reasons.
so.. i want to tell my friend, that you don't have to feel bad about it ok? it's not the invitation that mattered, it's the fact the you bothered to explain to me. so, thank you. you know i'll always love you ya *winks*
my big conclusion of the day is, communication matters alot.
no matter how busy you are, take a second to tell the person you care about how much you love him/her. you never know how much difference that second makes.
ok i really wrote alot.
i think i'm pms-ing...
