ok this is a video played during one of my presentations by one of the groups.. and all of us were laughing heartily.. 'cause its really cute and it incorporated everything we've studied (but of course ours is in greater detail. sighs)
so have a good laugh while watching this video ya~
i'm supposed to study. i'm only 1 chapter into the 3 i'm supposed to read for tomorrow's tutorial. sighs again.. felt like coming online. but when i come online there's nothing for me to do. missing someone, i think..
ok i supposed to go back study.. hmm but i shall listen to abit more songs then start studying again..
i thought i was fine too.. but it turned out that i wasn't i couldn't stay there another minute longer i had to get out of that place i had to walk away
this is driving me crazy..
just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to doesn't mean that they don't love you with all they have
[x]uan @ 15:22
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Monday, October 16, 2006
been studying the whole day and i feel so hardworking.. =) and its so exciting!!! i'm studying and i feel so excited 'cause i really like what i'm reading. i don't even feel sleepy (which i normally do when i start reading) and i didn't yawn and start dozing off!!! proud of myself.. hee..
really like what i'm studying.. and its really nice to be so interested in what's written in my book, and i want to find out more. and even nicer when i start taking out notes and textbooks from other modules and start drawing inferences.. finally, i have a clue of what i'm interested in and a glimpse of what i want to do in future =)
and i slotted in some stupid thoughts in between when i was studying.. started day-dreeeeeeeeeeaming.. and then i told myself to SNAP OUT OF IT!!!! haaa...
some things are better left untouched.. it's better to self-delude than to believe in everything.. and, imagining is better than facing the truth..
jiayou~
[x]uan @ 16:28
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Sunday, October 15, 2006
i used to keep saying sorry while he will say 'thank you's now i choose to say 'thank you' instead. saying sorry is too sad...
thank you for telling me so many things.. it will always be in my memory. and no, i remember everything.. did not bury it deep in my heart.. everything.. how you used to send me back even though you're so tired how you used to send me home with a promised '933-tuned speedy and comfy ride' home how i used to scream at you for putting your hand outside the car how i used to scream at you to slow down how you used to send me back home and wave me goodbye from downstairs how we chatted every night and i will wake up with a sms on my phone how you used to call me just for a short while even though you're busy how you used to be so excited when i called you when you're with your friends how we used to go out and you will hold my hand in the car how you used to manage to sneak in kisses in between the ride home how everything felt so right and i was so in love...
thank you for giving my closure.. for getting angry at me and telling me i'm not statistics.. for telling me you missed me, and you miss me for telling me you loved me, and you love me..
i thought i was ok, thought i got over it.. but i cried, again..
i promise you. i will move on, and i will forget you soon. i will be ok. and i will work hard to fulfil my promise to you. i will do well this sem.
i missed you... and i miss you.. wishing i can be beside you to throw everything away.. and that you will be ok too.. take care~
[x]uan @ 01:33
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Friday, October 13, 2006
i'm so determined to do well this sem.. i made a promise to someone to obtain a cap 4 for this sem.. and i just made my 1st step!!! got back my abnormal psyc quiz results and i think i did ok! =) so happy.. hope this continues with all my others papers.. hopefully this is not just a phenomenon because the lecturer set an easy paper.. =x
met up with loo to chill @ plaza starbucks (again).. think thats our fav hangout place liao.. and irene!! u're gonna turn into xiang!! you 2!! stop MIA-ing and spend some timw with me and loo! influence us with your siao-ness.. me + loo = talk cock and start to feel sad about life combi hahahaha
ran into alot of ppl @ plaza today!! i mean, hell lot la!! those ppl whom i haven seen in ages all come to plaza today!! 1st person i saw when i went plaza (just outside starbucks): gay & lyon.. went up to them and chatted abit.. told them irene always tell me stories about thenm. its amazing ah, cuz i was never close to them. just know each other but hardly talked. just very nice to see them there.. then i met up with loo.. she's not counted.. next up is: guixiong!! i haven't seen him in agessssssss!!! my childhood friend. the steady guy who's always there.. just started talking to him recently and its nice to see him =) then: zhongkai. i rem i used to be quite close to him. not the, close close kind. but the, got talk though not super close kind. and the thing is, i can't rem why i was on talking terms with him in the 1st place.. i think it's cause of yingwen, but i can't rem why also... then is: wancai.. loo is supposed to meet him, so i guess thats not quite counted. but i haven't seen him for a long time too, despite him staying (almost) opposite me. i can see his block from my window. haa.. then i saw boon hong. i can't rem whether that's his name somemore.. said hi to each other then walked away.. he's not my friend to begin with anyway..
and the funniest thing is, everyone i mentioned know each other!! but i know them from different places.. guixiong: since young gay: err this is a tough one.. i just happen to know him lor.. haa.. lyon: SA?? hahaha zhongkai: swiss wancai: swiss boon hong: SA
aiyo its so complicated.. i don't even know how to explain this chim chim connection.. loo was asking me if i want to draw mind map.. hahahaha the world is so small...
i need to learn to smile happily again..
[x]uan @ 21:56
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Tuesday, October 10, 2006
i remember i wanted to write something.. and i logged in.. and i can't remember....
sometimes, 'i miss you' means alot more than 'i love you', i think.. it means someone's thinking of you.. that means alot more than loving you, don't you think? i don't miss you, but i love you.. thats so sad.. i don't love you, but i miss you.... sounds sad too, but i don't know.. sounds like a mixture of sadness and sweetness.. someone's missing you... and thinking of you... and that means something.. means a big deal, i think.. to have someone missing you...
me n loo.. are both scared of marriage.. and scared of love.. don't want to be fooled again.. don't want to cry in the night again.. don't want to be hurt again.. don't want to go through the same thing again.... enough is enough..
don't want to believe again.. don't want to trust again.. if i must build a shield of defence, i will.. if i have to be independent, i will.. if i have to be strong, i will too..
[x]uan @ 16:58
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Monday, October 09, 2006
yea i'm up till the wee hours again was contemplating to go sleep just now, but after inconsistent napping, i decided i want to finish the paper then sleep. i still work best at night la.. no fight de.. at night nobody to disturb me, nobody to talk to me. and i wont eat anything, so i won't keep thinking of food. the only thing i will think of is bed, so its a driving force to make me work! hahaha yea i still love the night best..
this is the time i used to go SA!! so nice~ haven't been awake so early for quite some time. kinda missed the times i used to wake up @ 540 and leave house @ 610 to catch the bus @ 620. hahaha yea you got it! i calculate the time to make sure i catch the same bus everyday.. i don't like changes..
love the silence of the night.. but dawn is breaking soon.. and the silence will be gone, but the bustling of the city will be back.. and i don't like that.. i like to stand at the window, feel the wind against me and smile at the moon....
[x]uan @ 06:18
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Sunday, October 08, 2006
don't know what have i been doing the whole day i cant seem to get myself to settle down to work.. -sighs- anyway, loo just called me and we mentioned something about the Master Khor that we both went to see before about palmistry.. and i cant remember what he said about me.. so.... i went to search my blog for the entry on it.. i remember i blogged about it.. and i found it!!! its here! read through it.. and i still think it's true.. hmmmm..
[x]uan @ 18:24
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The Keys to Your Heart
You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.
In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.
You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.
In this moment, you think of love as something you don't need. You just feel like flirting around and playing right now.
see the 2 different explanantions? the one on top is the one i just did. the one below is what i did a year ago.. some things really dont change. hahahaha but experiences change, and mentality change.. but well, not everything is true, i guess..
The Keys to Your Heart
You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.
In love, you feel the most alive when things are straight-forward, and you're told that you're loved.
You'd like to your lover to think you are optimistic and happy.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.
Your ideal relationship is lasting. You want a relationship that looks to the future... one you can grow with.
Your risk of cheating is low. Even if you're tempted, you'd try hard not to do it.
You think of marriage something you've always wanted... though you haven't really thought about it.
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily.
[x]uan @ 15:50
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the air's been so bad recently!!! omg.. yesterday it even hit a new high of 150 at 9pm!!!! my family were watching tv and keeping ourselves updated of the (rising) PSI.. hahahaha
its very jialat lar.. until i dont even feel like staying home.. want to go out and stay in air-conditioned places.. i mean, the past few days were bad but it wasnt horrible. but yesterday was terrible!!!!!! the whole sky was grey and there's always this chao tar smell in the air. and as sy said, it's most obvious when you step out from a air-conditioned place!! sighs....
when will the indonesians stop these rubbish every year?? they want to set all these fires is their business.. but when they start affecting other people, then its not good le ma.. hmm.
thank goodness i woke up to a clear sky today!! was so happy when i can see the buildings from my window.. yday they were a blur..
i have a paper to rush and a test to study for.. damn..
its finally over.. he told me, tt i mattered.. but i guess, over mean over le...
everything has a deadline....
[x]uan @ 01:45
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Friday, October 06, 2006
feeling really stupid to believe what he said. should've known right from the beginning. kept telling myself its not gonna happen, and don't hold any hopes already but.. i can't.. i can't just pretend nothing happened..
i am still waiting...
[x]uan @ 23:49
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Monday, October 02, 2006
我会等你,因为你爱过。<--- this was a friend's nick.. and i felt so sad after i read this